Embracing your identity and purpose in life, especially in retirement, can help you avoid negative behaviors that thwart your happiness, joy, and well-being.

Retirement is a significant milestone that can bring a mix of emotions. For some, it’s a long-awaited freedom to pursue passions and dreams. However, retirement is not just a change in routine; it is a transition in identity. Many individuals have built their sense of self around their careers, job titles, and achievements. Some folks delay their retirement date for fear of not knowing who they are or what they will do.

Therefore, when the time comes to bid farewell to the workplace, they are left questioning who they are beyond their professional or caregiving roles. It is crucial to recognize that retirement is a journey of self-discovery, where individuals are forced to confront the question: What makes me me?

External factors, such as jobs and societal expectations, often shape our identities especially when we are younger.

• The Workaholic. Individuals who define themselves solely by their work become stagnant if they don’t find a purpose for their energy. One challenge is that such individuals may have used work to escape their relationships at home.

• The Caregiver. If all you are doing is taking care of others, you neglect yourself and burn out. Giving to others starts with having a personal boundary and learning how and when to say “no.”

• The Perfectionist. This is a miserable way to live because you can’t let go. Practice the 80% rule: Get things done to 80% good enough. After that, it’s diminishing returns.

• The Materialist. Keeping up with the Joneses or being “the richest man in the graveyard” does not create happiness, just a lack of fulfillment.

As we transition into retirement, our identity determines our purpose. The fulfillment we experience stems from living out our purpose. The core drivers of identity and purpose are:

• Connecting: our innate drive to connect and attach to our community.

• Learning: the constant drive to learn, grow, and change.

• Authenticity: discovering our true, best, and authentic selves.

• Structuring daily life: mindfully designing routines, events, and action items that support our authentic selves.

Retirement is not just a time to stop working; it is an opportunity for self-discovery and embracing a new identity, while addressing and removing dysfunctional patterns and behaviors.

Embracing our true identity and purpose in retirement allows us to find happiness, joy, and well-being in this new chapter of our lives.

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